Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo Plan Bahamas Wedding
It doesn’t seem that long ago that I was watching “Newlyweds” on MTV with Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson. I thought they were the cutest couple and perfect for each other despite the fact that Jessica always seemed so ditzy. Then, news of their divorce surfaced and it was quite shocking that this perfect couple had succumbed to the pressures of Hollywood. I held out hope they would get back together, but that seemed less and less likely as Nick moved on to Vanessa Minnillo.
This weekend Nick and Vanessa announced that they will tie the knot in the Bahamas. That’s right; Nick and Jessica are old news. It’s “’til death do us part” for Nick and Vanessa. And you know what? I think they just might make it. Their relationship seems lower key, read “Vanessa’s not a diva,” and she’s not bringing in millions more than he is. So at least they won’t have that issue. Maybe MTV will offer them a “Newlyweds: Second Time Around” series. We would probably all watch it!
The national divorce rate is about 50 percent. That means that one out of every two couples who get married will get divorced. So, let us hope that since Nick already has one divorce under his belt that his second marriage to Vanessa will be successful. But, it makes me wonder why there are so many divorces in the first place.
I think it is because too many of us are looking for relationships to complete us, as the famous line from Jerry Maguire goes. But, in reality, we need to complete ourselves first and then look for someone who is also complete that we are attracted to. When we are unhappy and alone we feel that a companion, and marriage, will somehow magically create this happy life for us. And when it doesn’t happen divorce is the only way out for those of us who are still seeking happiness, but have never found it. The best advice is for people to focus on themselves and look inward to find the root of their unhappiness. Then, fix it, and when happiness results, only then are you ready for a serious relationship or even marriage.
But, you are probably wondering how you can make yourself happy if you have always been looking to someone else to do it for you. Different things work for different people, but I had a friend who went about finding her own happiness in a very logical manner.
She just sat down with a pen and paper and wrote down all the things in her life she was unhappy with. This included physical aspects as well as education, travel, job performance, and even where she lived. Once she had a good list going she started making changes until she completed the list and realized she was fulfilled. She had traveled the world, learned another language, lost 15 pounds, finished her degree, and bought a house of her own. She was happy and ready to find true love to enhance her life.
So, think about making your own list if you are looking for love, in never ending bad relationships, or even if you have just gotten divorced. You can be happy! The great thing is you alone do have that power. So, harness it and make yourself happy. You’ll be part of the 50 percent that stays together!